Did you go home with that guy without me?
Sorry boo - it's pouring and I found a boy with a car
so i stopped by cvs on the way home this morning, turns out hallmark doesnt make an im sorry my friend puked on your friend card, call me if were still speaking
I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
LETS GO REDSKINS!
Quit drinking and watching your DVR, it's wednesday.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just sat in the Taco Bell drive-thru waiting for a trash can to take my order. Yes, that high.
and i was just like oh shit i'm getting felt up by a 15 year old
I'm posted up in the bathroom at au bon pain, high as balls, experimenting with eyeshadow combinations and listening to 90s jlo. The girl in the stall next to me just plopped a big one and I laughed, hope I ruined her day
WAIT DID YOU MAIL ME A KITTEN
Joined a porch party below me by climbing out the window and jumping off the roof. Tonight will be good
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fingerblasting some girl on the deck tryna get her to fuck on a lifeboat
How does she have a hairless cat and a husband it's not fair. Both are hard to come by
Let's get a hotel room this time. I really don't want to sleep in a Dennys parking lot again.
I deserve to have sex with a hot freshman ok
We just fucked each other sober. #goteam
i'm not sure you can trust me in a car with 20 dozen donuts
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