A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
Do you think my job would send me for a second drug test if i took a whole pumpkin pie to work for lunch tomorrow?
Im going home to examine my vagina with a hand mirror. wish me luck.
I know now the amount of smoke it takes to set off the fire alarm....no longer worried about using the bong...not even close
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I cannot for the life of me remember why I am holding this rabbit.
It doesn't matter how many times you look in your purse, Your keys are not going to be there. Maybe you left them at the bar.
Maybe they fell out of my pocket last night when I rolled down the hill.
Explain it like you would if you were talking to a 5 yo
Wait no, like you would to a stoned high school freshman.
100% truth: never tied someone to a bed using 4 pairs of sweatpants before
I have a callous on the palm of my hand just below my ring finger that is entirely from opening so many beer bottles. I'm strangely proud right now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
Her craziness is the sexiest thing about her.
I can't wait to read your obituary.
so i ran into nick. i may be more gay than anticipated
Nothing says male bonding like watching porn with your grandpa
It's 1pm, she's in the shower, I don't have the guts tell her I wasn't her blind date. Someone got stood up.
I made out with my moms boyfriends son last night. Thanksgiving is gonna be reeeal fun!
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