my ass hurt today after the party last night. I wnt to the doctors and they found a coin in a ziplock bag with a note from you. WHAT THE FUCK DID U DO TO ME???
Since when is my name a synonym for head?
you went up to him and asked if you could have "friend sex." He looked like a 7 year old on christmas morning
it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Duuuude - Drag Queen Bingo wasn't supposed to end like thissss
I hooked up with a 20 year old last night. I feel like a hocus pocus witch that sucked life from a child.
They just showed up to the party with a shopping cart full stolen of naty ice cans, no boxes, just cans. Shit just got real !
Wrapped in a blanket, just ate a whole party pizza. All my dreams are coming true and you don't even care.
I have managed to reach the 'after meth poster look' before lunch here...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Next time someone asks you what your spirit animal is do you really want to answer the iowa state fair butter cow?
We accept all of your sexual lovers, Jewish, episcopalian, atheist. Dick is dick
Oh and people at work think i got knocked up so my gay roomie is claiming it as his lol
I cant miss out on a half day of work without a booty call
Ignore him I am the one that wears the pants in the relationship while "the big man" cries in bed
The work outs are working. Someone just said my body type was “Tits On A Stick”.
Randomize