please tell me if i'm home and in my bed
negative
come find me please
either she said she was feeling frisky or eating friskies..i was too drunk to understand.
Is it sad that I find it completely normal that I just took batteries out of a vibrator to put them in a pencil sharpener so I could do homework?
I find this completely acceptable.
I am a mess. Weirdest thing: I woke up with a hammer under my pillow. No idea why.
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I woke up and we were making out. So the good news is that after two years off the market, I haven't lost a step. I'm picking up girls in my sleep now.
he's doing fine. just headbutted the wall and threw up
The floor and the wall just switched. I'm falling.
I am "lost the control of my head" high right now.
did you not get the photos of the finger bruises on my ass?
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I didn't punch him it was just love coming out of my fist
He said "you speak American pretty good for a Canadian" and it took everything in me to still fuck him. Dry spell ended btw
7% of guys ive been with can get me off... I did the math!
Also you can't just sext a Michelle quote from Full House.
It's just not St. Patrick's Day until someone pukes on your panties.
Tequila. The ruiner of all good intentions.
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