I love family holidays its the only time when playing beer pong, and smoking hookah with my family isnt looked down upon
you were sitting on my toliet with a double cheesburger in your hand asking me how the cheeseburger even got there.
I actually had no interest in him until he started talking about his 4 arrests. That made him go from a 5 1/2 to a 8, easily.
do you wanna get some fucking pussy tonight.....THEN DRESS LIKE IT
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She used the introduce me to her roommates so she could find out my name trick the next morning..I may be in love.
Dude i thought about you literally the second after I came. This friendship is starting to cross some serious boundaries
Shots and making dong molds for my gf's friends. Typical Monday night activities.
I drove two hours just to throw up on myself today at the beach. My family saw the whole thing and my younger cousin cried
You have no idea what this goes for my ego. I literally made you cum in your sleep.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You gotta hand it to him. 6 hours in a new town and he's already fuck someone, had his ass kick by her bf, and rounded up a posse of people to kick this guys ass.
How can I politely yet provocatively ask you for a cock shot?
Normally, it will inspire me to work. Today, it's inspiring me to masturbate.
It's 6am and I had to explain to the gas station attendant why I didn't have shoes on and I'm covered in maple syrup.
When I told her I was deaf and took my hearing aids out at night to sleep, she said it must be nice not having to hear drunken roommates having awkward sex late at night.
His mom just pulled off a quadruple cockblock. I'm not sure if I'm mad or impressed?
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