She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
i just woke up with two martini umbrellas taped to my nipples... idk how they got there
do you think there was ever a doctor who smelled his finger after giving a prostate exam?
im pretty sure i just dented her unborn child.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Swear. I think after passing out in a community college parking lot I can safely nominate myself for the piece of shit of the year award
the two person party stopped when i realized that he tried to throw a hammer at my head.
I want a coyote to ride back and forth to the bathroom because walking is getting old
I have a vague memory of you tryin to ride a unicycle through jimmy johns
I found us a new booze connection and I'm writing college admissions essays. The future is bright.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
is there a line between daddy kink and oedipus complex?
Yeah. I woke up in an awkward three way spoon with him and his sister. Tequila!
You can't give me tequila around boys who have girlfriends. That ain't new.
woke up to my little sister's best-friend's boyfriend in my bed, but how's your saturday going?
Just an fyi, you also tried to wrangle a peacock last night.
Are you aware that you called your mom to say hi before you dragged the random guy into bed last night?
Randomize