I love that she's always that person who people think it's a good idea to invite her to something. and then she's there and you realize, "nope."
to be honest..when i was little i used to think sharks can swim out of drains and eat people
We've been fucking since Friday.... This is the most committed non-committed relationship I've ever been in
She brought up feelings... her days are numbered
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This went bad. Everyone is crying, i dont know why and I am really uncomfortable.
If you invite me to a bar tonight my liver will kick you in the testicles
I hope we all get so wasted that we ride the cows again
I think I may be the only girl in the world that can say she has fallen asleep grasping a penis..... 3 different times...... 3 different penises
I'm cutting her off I can't have my good name soiled with these kinds of shenanigans
Shit is preposterous
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i woke up with a kayak in my amazon shopping cart with 1 wrong digit on my credit card and the transaction wasn't going through.
I met her parents last night. Her dad smelled like weed and kept yelling "I HAVE ALLERGIES AHHH MY EYES ARE BURNING!" During dinner It had to be good weed he didn't even know he was yelling.
we should most definitely have a fire extinguisher in the apartment. like... for sure
I'm not saying I'm planning to hook up tomorrow but I'm also not saying I'm unprepared for it
I couldn't have possibly been that bad
You had her flip the penny over to the lucky side before you picked it up and ate it...
This is the third time I have overheard parents tell their children "don't be that girl" in reference to me. I'm either doing something horribly wrong or amazingly right
Randomize