she's got that wholesome 16 and pregnant look.
You know, I had the money for a pregnancy test, but at the time, tacos were more important.
I don't think going to Relay for Life and painting our faces while everyone stares at us is a sufficent late night after the bars.
You wouldnt be able to explain the can of green beans in my mailbox, would you?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She had another shot and asked if I wanted to taste her tongue ring. Then I helped her pee.
He's cute when he's drunk, too. Also he tried to fight my door...
Why the fuck did I wake up in a chair with mouth clamps?!
I was carrying around a bottle of Jameson yelling rescue me
Nothing says besties like laying naked in bed hungover arguing over who is getting the pants
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
being single and having a boyfriend 300 miles away is eerily similar. never skipped a beat eating hot wings in my bed with no pants or masturbating every day.
he showed me his third nipple on the first date. I might have low to no standards, but my god.
I am all the way hung over and want nothing more in this world than a McMuffin. Happy day after Thanksgiving.
Stay strong! Remember we're too uncoordinated to be strippers to make money instead of being a nurse
I thought he was hot. You know, in a “I’ve gone batshit insane and want blood for the blood god” sort of way.
Just bought shot glasses from the thrift store. I think the guy buying a winter coat was even judging me.
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