"romantic friends" sounds more classy then friends with benfits
jacking off on stolen wireless... gotta enjoy the small things in life
Literally passed out while tubing... Boating while hammered is a blast but thank God for life jackets
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I made him sleep with a condom on and i passed out on the carpet with only a bra on.
Dude if our hands were ladels we could work at a soup kitchen
That would be so convenient
I kept petting the scarves and telling customers to "feel that shit"
Stop drinking at work.
He showed up in booty shorts and no shirt and said dont laugh dont ask questions and give me a fucking final and no one in class said anything we just sat there speehless
I told your dad we had a nice lunch and hung out for awhile. It seemed more appropriate than "I had a bite of his canned chili and then we ripped each others clothes off."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
when seducing a hipster, do you think taking a nude pic on a lomo-camera app would increase my chances? grainy off-colored boobs and telling him how much i like reading salinger?
And the night ended with some random dude pissing on a car in a vain attempt to find a proper bathroom. We, the drunk, salute you, sir!
When she said "Tighten your safety belt and hold on!", that should have been a clear sign to me that one should never go off-roading in a rental car. On the bright side, they were able to tow her car out the next morning.
I'm talking to a corgi on tinder..wtf has my life come to
Were not even through the second month of the year and I potentially may have torpedoed a marriage...
So, I can officially cross "getting eaten out in a church confession booth" off my bucket list.
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