I just fired a shotgun out of the back of a truck going 60. i am going to miss oregon.
John tries to set me up, and she has 1 arm. I'm a nice guy, but 2 arms is kinda a requirement
you know he's having a sex change. I can't believe you called him "titty man" to his face....
i just learned how to squirt via google. life is good.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think I just need to sleep with both of them to see which I want to date.
You just went from promiscuous to slut in 3.2 seconds.
the recent google searches were "were can i buy a porn horse, why does my heart hurt after drinking, and orlando's teen night..." your thought process perplexes me
According to the stories I've heard I decided I was a stuntman after my 6th shot of Jack
It's like the god of all feather dusters, but for your vagina
It really is the softest mustache
Apparently he took me home and I pulled up my senior pictures on fbook and made him guess what I was thinking during each different pose.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You should have totally come, I started watering down vodka with cider. I have lost the sense of taste.
Do the right thing and go fuck yourself off a cliff
Back at condo with chick. What is the condom situation urgent response needed
You know you've been having sex for 9 months when you do Rock Paper Scissors for who has to go on top
Whatever, ill dance on the bar at applebees, don't try and act like you're above it.
I'm that daughter that had to send her mother "DON'T GET SHITFACED" & yes, in ALL CAPS.
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