Apparently he's never heard a queef, he totally thought I farted and got freaked out.
oh my god i just remembered the cat blow jobs.
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
Funny how often beer equates to second degree burns on some portion of my body.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just saw a guy driving a atv down the highway in a tux.... only in Iowa...
I think I fixed my testicle. That's why I didnt pay $25 for a doctor to do it
Should i put up a tasteful banner for your party that says last chance to sleep with maya?
You screamed "show me a dick stand!" But before I could ask you wft that was you had passed out in the corner
Just had an epiphany about how to drink more effectively in the shower. While walking across campus carrying a Franzia bag like Santa
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's disgusting. He breathes through his mouth and just sounds fat. Plus he chews all loud and shit.
She's legally too young to drink and was making out with a guy who is ethically too old to drink.
You asked me what the point was. Told me your were dying alone and then had me take you and Wendy's where you bought 3 meals and ate them in about 10 minutes saying you didn't care if you got fat...
Are you planning on wandering into construction sites drunk and falling down 6' holes?
probably
Just had my butthole waxed. If that changes your plans for Saturday..
Typically a man doesn't buy a woman a drink in hopes of her laughing at his penis, but no one said I was normal.
Randomize