it feels like theres a golf ball between my legs. the sex was totally worth it tho.
i blame lastnights decisions on friday the 13th
I knew shit got real when the pinapple was gone and people were just passing around the core and gnawing on it.
Once two people had broken bones it had become a bulk hospital trip so we took the party bus
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Started with us just having a beer. Now Ivan lit a torch to walk to the store, Ben smashed a 26 in the parking lot, and they're throwing broken shot glasses. Fratio Friday is something.
As usual, I had to fight him for his car keys. Though this time he made it to the valet garage. All the Hispanic attendants gathered around and watched. Felt like I was in a cock fight.
Well you tried to pay for a drink with your keys for one...
do you think this outfit says "I maintained my dignity this weekend"?
I wonder how your parents would feel if the scarf they gave me for Christmas is mainly being used for a blindfold during sex...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were supposed to behave this weekend.
But... naked.
you know it was a successful halloween when you wake up and have a firecracker in your tits
It just smells like spaghetti and despair.
What! You have to go to class. Otherwise, you're wasting money that could have been spent on weed. Gotta get that shit in perspective.
Being a slave to ur dick is exhausting.
Some nights you do cocaine till 5:00 in the morning, and the next night you teach yourself how to crochet. It’s called balance.
Randomize