I want to have your abortion
I am in a vortex of obligation.
I wish i was in the wii world.
I'll tell you what, we couldn't have asked for better binge-drinking weather.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I told my mom happy mother's day then rubbed my belly and said "Oh, and happy grandmother's day too..." She started sobbing. You were right, that wasn't the best way to tell her.
Just saw my father's penis. Don't know what to say.
I told him I'd put in a good word. And the word of the day is: NEGATIVE
We have a drunken confused pantless man in our apt. Boots.
I'm scared to see what happens if we keep winning like this. I don't think there enough livers for every one after the season is over.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What I thought was my travel sanitizer was actually my travel lube. Most awkward transit ride of all time!
Day two of not drinking, I think my cat is trying to eat me.
Psychosis secondary to sobriety???
You're like my little fucked up version of the groundhog seeing its shadow, only it's boobs and warm weather.
He's got a beautiful penis, I can't lie
You were like a drunk and unconscious tickle me elmo.
New rock bottom. Woke up at 7 am fully clothed in a bathtub full of water. I hate myself.
Randomize