Nope changed our mind. Decided your strange bacon like body odor wasn't what we want to smell tonight.
The douche that always wears spandex at the gym just walked into class with a dick going into his mouth drawn on his face. The professor said "rough night" and he still has no idea. Tyring to get a pic
"Students using Axe body spray to light selves on fire" is a real headline from a real newspaper. WHY AREN'T WE DOING THIS RIGHT NOW?
And I'm supposed to be surprised that you got another concussion?
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From what I hear, her blowjob factory was runninng at full capacity this weekend.
I feel like I just gave a blowjob to a freight train.
I am sitting here. Drinking from a bottle of vodka. Eating shredded cheese from a bag and waiting on him to pick me up after he finishes with his girlfriend. This is what dreams are made of.
He made me this shot called the allergen. It was a shot of vodka with a Claritin dropped in it.
I'm on my fifth cocktail in twenty minutes. I don't think I will end this on two legs.
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The fact that he said "there's nothing wrong with being a raging drunk, just ask my mother." has me thinking that I have no positive role-models among my friends.
He's in grad school at Harvard. I suppose that means my vagina is now smarter than I am.
I know how vodka works Grace. I'm drunk, not stupid.
PS- My flight is being emergency landed bc someone smuggled cats on the plane.
Remind me to never do anything where hiding something in my butt is the best course of action
He just compared fucking my vagina to a snow flake falling on his forehead: gentle.... I'm not sure if that's a compliment or not.
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