halloween makes it hard to decipher real cops... from sexy men dressed up as them.
She was so adorably desperate I didn't have the heart to tell her I wasn't a lesbian. So now She's making waffles, may switch teams over this.
If I had a penis, I would stick it EVERYWHERE. I don't know what these guys are doing.
we've coined the Sunday morning ritual of taking out our puke-filled trash cans as The Trash Of Shame
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I deem it safe for us to drink together again.
They dropped the charges?
Yeppers. Come drink beers.
You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come
and you stopped teaching...why?
getting up at 8am to start drinking seemed like a much better idea before I had to wake up at 8am
I'm not wearing a bra, watching Netflix and eating gushers. I don't know a better way to spend a hangover.
He goes to Columbia so regardless of how he looks I should fuck him right?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
But I did spend part of my morning scrubbing your cum off my grandmothers piano.
And now whenever I see a documentary about dolphins, I think about sex, which is super weird
Ryan Reynolds is on sesame street right now. Dressed as a letter A but still sexy as fuck. PBS is so considerate of the stay at home mom.
Yeah but you let me touch your butt. You're clearly the winner.
Dude how much would someone have to pay you to get you to slide your vagina across a bald man's head because Honestly I'd do it for the experience alone. but money would be nice too\n\nI'm thinkin like 500 bucks. Maybe 700
Why are you like this.
Only you would offer whiskey to a man in liver failure.
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