Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
I'm high, and her 2,100 tagged pictures annoy me even MORE. I wish it had a google searchbar so I could type in "cleavage pics" to get to the point.
once she started licking the door on the stall, i got out of there and told her bf "this is your problem now" and walked away
He just asked for the blowjob I promised him 3 years ago that he'd get the next time Michigan beat Ohio State. Goddamnit.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
hooked up with the gay kid & his friend's mom told me "you know he has a identical twin brother whose straight, right?"
I drove your lawn mower home. Hope you don't need it tonight. I'll bring it over tomorrow.
Seriously, it sounds like someone is torturing a dozen cats inside a Japanese techno club while a jamaican yells random hipster words through a megaphone.
It's like the sisterhood of the traveling vaginas over here
She needs more friends. Or a second therapist.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Only you could make a stripper uncomfortable by eye fucking her too much.
YOU GAVE HIM A BLOWJOB ON YOUR DOORSTEP?!
Would you consider masturbating to Hocus Pocus an adulthood high or low?
I lost a fight last night. By that I mean I head butt the bar and busted my lip open.
By the time we got to McDonald's you were sharing a Big Mac with a stripper.
Got everyone out of my house, somehow managed to put all my lawn furniture back, puked in my sink, and cleaned it up all while black out drunk before my parents came home. Successful night.
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