i just rode the bull and i see vomit in my future.
every time I worry about a career mistake, I remember Michelle Pfeiffer did Grease 2.
Are they hot? And are the slutty? These are my concerns for any wedding. You say yes, and yes, I will be your best man
she screamed "my eye!" and it brought me a surge of bad memories. except she was yelling about a lemon.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If I refrain from fucking my manager, I'm going to reward myself by fucking that guy from the photo department.
while you've been gone this has kinda turned into some sort of fivesome-type thing. just thought i should warn you for when you get back
She sprinted out of the bathroom and ran all the way into the middle of the street. Five minutes later she came back with a banana nut muffin. She's that kind of drunk.
Honey, I don't care how "classic you" this is. It's not gonna matter if we can't find you in the morning.
just used my sex toy cleaning solution to clean my reading glasses. midterms are cramping my styleeee
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Welp, I can cross "making out with a guy in a dress" off my bucket list...
I climbed out of the shower to him sitting on the floor trimming his pubes with nail clippers, we both just started laughing at how drunk we were
Thank you. I woke up with a beard hair in my mouth. Super classy.
there’s plenty of nice guys out there with good jobs and NO felonies!
I hate when I wake up and find my vibrator next to me. Such a waste of an orgasm...getting myself off in my sleep and not remembering
PSA Do not blow dry your junk.
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