he just texted me two pictures of his dick. i feel i should rethink whatever vibe im obviously giving out
so is it as big as he says?
he put a tube of toothpaste next to it as a reference. it looks legit
I made out with a deaf person. Also I've been drunk 11 days in a row now.
yea i came on her face and told her to bring a snorkel next time
SANTA'S REAL. I GOT MY PERIOD.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She was kind of put off because I kept calling her baby my spirit animal and staring hungrily at her breasts.
They ran through the sprinklers in front of campus police, shirtless. Singing "love is a battlefield"
Birthday Treasure Hunt was to follow the clues. At each spot there was a stick on tattoo and a shot and at the end there was 2 cases of beer. I have 13 tattoos and don't remember turning 18.
Apparently I've been blackout drunk doing abstract algebra on the floor
I can feel my moral fiber fraying.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
True love: he brought me a margarita while was in the shower. He's a keeper.
If there is a heaven, that's what it will be. Bagel Bites and cunnilingus.
It's a good thing he's hot, because it seemed like he was trying to do CPR on my private parts
I'm fucking sick of guys. I think I'm going to date myself. No drama. And I know I'll always put out.
I woke up the whole house screaming I need my shorts they found me in the kitchen with a bag of strawberries naked
If you feel frisky later I have a cowboy hat that would look great on you naked...
Who is this......
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