Yea well when i pee it makes steam.
Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
she tossed me in the back of the car and said "god gave u the gift of life and I wanna swallow it"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he asked me for a gerbil feeder full of alcohol
he ate me out on his front porch at dawn. i orgasmed when the sun began to rise. most romantic morning booty call ever.
It was relaxing until your penis crawled in my ear.
Anywho, an ostrich attacked me today. Fucking useless pieces of shit birds.
All I wanted was a couple of orgasms before work, is that too much to ask?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She's one of those people who could be either 16 or 23. In which case she's too old for me or in dangerously jailbait territory for you, bro.
I just put poptarts in the toaster with the wrapper on, that's how hungover I am.
My sinuses still burn from snorting red wine last night.
I just do things that aren't classy the classy way.
all I remember is screming at her "I want you and your tortillas... DEAD"
He showed up at my house drunk with a pizza and said he wanted to lazily finger me while I watched supernatural. Who was I to say no?
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