im 80% sure the guy across from me is taking pictures of my legs
Just saw an Asian guy riding his razor scooter to class. Dreams do come true
So, how do I go about conveying: I'm sorry, yet very glad she is having my abortion. Via text msg?
I hope so. I just start to question my lifestyle when i pee on coffee tables
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Pretty sure a homeless guy just told me to 'lick his balls clean' because I looked at him.
He came in my eye, I lost my earring and all of his friends saw me topless. Happy New Year to you as well.
I made him recite stats from the playoffs game last night before I would go down on him.
it's been dubbed the summer of antibiotics
He bought me Ben & Jerrys and then apologized for the fact that he was going to fall asleep before we could have sex
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When your boyfriends ex-girlfriend texts you to see what you're wearing to his sister's wedding that you were not invited to, nor knew about. I think it's time to call it quits.
My exam ends at 4pm so I plan to be passed out in the bar by 5pm. Want to join me?
SO DRUNK
PUKED IN DRIVEWAY
TELL PARENTS SORRY
New drinking game idea: Take a shot for every republican you see on facebook bitching about the ruling.
these past three weeks have been a real "fuck you" to my liver
I cut him off because he was changing my thermostat every time he came over
You made the right decision
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