You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
Getting pregnant off pre-cum is like getting high off erasers
I feel like my whole life has been one big pre-game for Mexico.
she's not going to take you seriously with an empty 40 and a sombrero on your head.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
suddenly, hermaphrodite night sounds like a really bad idea
When I woke up in the parking lot today I decided it is not a good idea to hang out with you anymore.
The idea of snorting emergen-c actually just crossed my mind.
You'd be surprised at the stuff my vagina tells my brain to say
I got laid and laid off at a conference in long beach all on the same day
Eh. They balance each other out
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My sharpie cut off line was invaded last night. Where's my turtleneck?
Yes. Amanda is the only option and I want cake so I can sacrifice my vagina.
No shame December is a go.
that's the first time I've heard "shenanigans" and "apocalypse" in the same sentence
I just wanted a bootycall and now somehow I'm at his parents playing dominoes. But they have tequila so it's cool
His name was toto. That should have been my red flag
You were yelling at them from the passenger seat saying you wanted your chicken for free because they couldn't prove it was from kentucky
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