Well the candle wax mightve been sexy if he didn't drop the candle and light half my bed on fire
she told me her fantasy was her as a 55 year old cook at a truck stop who smokes a pack a day, and I was the 21 year old illegal immigarnt prep cook.
have you facebook stalked him yet?
No, I don’t know his last name...
Just google his license plate numb
Be careful down there, Shane may have pooped on the carpet.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.
dude, never let a drunk girl playbite your dick. the doctor came in laughed and left.
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
I bought a fake diamond ring to wear, not only to bars to keep the creeps away, but so that I'll be judged less by the front desk girl at Planned Parenthood
Good thing it was his birthday because I accidentally grabbed his dick at the bar. A lot.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Drinking with mariachis at jimmy johns.
This is what we do on Thursday nights. Spray tans, blunts and drawing pictures of cats.
All I'm saying is the next time I see him naked, there better be something in it for me that doesn't end in bailing him out of jail.
Don't get into any trouble on your trip
The only foreseeable trouble would be pregnancy, but I gotta be sterile otherwise I'm beating some pretty fucking incredible odds
I'm not sure you count what happened last night as sex.
Jenna is yelling bc of the condom wrappers and cum stains. This is the 3rd and last time you have sex in my roommates bed.
Randomize