Get your hand out of your ass!
how did you know my hand was in my ass? Guess where my other hand is..?
In your belly button
Watching intervention at a bar. Who let this happen??
herpes texted me again. he says he wants my vagina.
ok we should really consider changing this guys nickname...
having to delete all your hookups stored in your phone as first name followed by frat/bar after they've graduated is such a bittersweet feeling
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so apparently mom and dad slept together on the first date
i guess it runs in the family.
This gyro tastes like lonliness
it wasn't the penis i had been hoping for.....but i took it regardless.
Hahah fuuuck, bag pipers played around me while I threw up. Literally
a kid puked on the floor and instead of, you know, cleaning it they cut a square out of the carpet with a boxcutter and threw it outside
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We got security called on us. Apparently the wedding down the street didn't appreciate the trespassing or our loud as fuck rendition of We Are Young.
Just to an Octoberfest and a sex party. Nothing wild.
im bringing home some absinth and some holy water. one way or another things are going to get spiritual.
So I might join you on the drunk train on the way to poor decisions.
How was it?
i think i smell bacon but im to sore to walk downstairs. that kinda night
You peed on a flamingo?!?
Randomize