There was a fist fight in my basement last night at four in the morning, in case you were wondering
It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
I may have been to starbucks and 2 classes with balls still written on my face...
When you come back do you think I could print anorexic pictures of Mary-Kate?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can totally hide my daquiri in my sling.
There are babies in the room i shouldnt be high with babies in the room.
through my window right now you can see the hot chick next door is standing BUTT ASS NAKED eating peanut butter off a knife.
ill be there in 5.
If she wants to think that freshman 15 means sleeping with 15 guys than so be it I just gotta make sure I'm one of them.
How do i tell my boyfriend " I'm taking the two weeks im in Europe to fuck my way across 9 countries" in a way where we will still be together?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've never known a guy to fuck more random girls in the ass then Dom. His rectal kill ratio is at like 85%
He's like the Derek Jeter of Anal
We are both federal employees and Obama gave us a four-day weekend to lie in bed. Do you know how many orgasms that will be? I knew there was a reason I voted for this guy.
I'm all for hockey players but dude, he asked me to lick his chipped tooth mid-hook up.
Just blew a guy who had the same phone case as me. It was destiny.
Duuuude someone spilled hot sauce all over the floor and trailing outside wtf
OH GOD IT'S BLOOD. THIS IS ALOT OF BLOOD.
Unexpected pro of the hostel though: literally down the street from Coors Field. I could literally fart on the building in five minutes.
Randomize