i feel like i'm waiting in line to date brett michaels
so i walked in, looked up the stairs and all i saw was smashed pumpkin, tube socks, and marinara sauce
talking dirty on facebook chat is the new phone sex.
I dont think that drinking by ourselves on a saturday night counts as being "fun alcoholics"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Preparing for thanksgiving at home now by chugging bourbon. Less than a month to train!
I don't not like him. It's just wierd talking to him because we both know I fucked his wife.
You called your ex's vag an "AIDS Pinata". Drunk You is the Hulk Hogan of insults.
I just got a call from the front desk apparently one of my feiends was dropped off by a handicap bus passed out in a wheel chair unlv is goig down
I found one of your hair extensions on the dance floor. You put it back in your hair
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Are you doing that thing where you're convinced I made a terrible decision
Daily.
Stay calm. It's a titty bar. A ring of cocaine will protect you.
dude, she has my telletubby sweats and my good sweatshirt hostage, I can't risk their safety with a breakup
Mom is talking about dicks with her friends in the living room. I am 5 seconds away from scaling the bathroom window out of here.
drunk snapchatting is the worst, because i woke up with great pictures of my tits saved to my memories and no idea who i sent them to
Our house drank 90 beers yesterday afternoon before 8pm so add that to the list
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