I just got wrote up for "repeatedly smelling like alcohol"
That was long passed due.
I love how kegs are figured into our monthly bills
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
yeah I'm sure your grandparents are the best but it's halloween. get a slutty costume and let's go ham.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think he's speaking German to me now
Nevermind, he's just drunk and not texting properly
These freshman guys were trying to holler at me from their window, and I realized about 20 minutes too late that the best possible reaction at that time would've been screaming "FLACCID PENIS". Oh, and I found this awesome zombie charm bracelet you would love.
Let's hurry up so I can puke at home instead of my van
Came home from this girls horse at 6am to find a guy lighting off roman candles in front of my door. Best walk of fame I've ever had.
I also just stashed a half dozen bobby pins in my bra.... So when you take it off later, consider yourself warned
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
First contact since we had sex and it's to get my HBO password. I sure pick winners huh
holy shit the yoga instructor bought his baby pig to class today
I imagine you as a cat holding your burrito with two paws and cutely eating it
I need to hurry up and get over my feelings for him so next year's tipsy reunion sex won't be clouded by emotions.
i just cleaned my bong... I do not feel healthy
This is what I get for listening to Christians.
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