so he came in my eye... should i throw out my contacts?
Well that's not true. She had two social skills. She kept them in her bra
sitting next to michael phelps in the airport. wonder if he's carrying...
It was like fucking a house. Down the chimney. That deep and empty.
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so my dad walked in on us having sex
lulz really? why?
lets just say he wont be answering to 'daddy' for a loooooong time
vaguely remember the bartender stopping me outside last night so he could pull the duct tape out of my hair
Next guy we share better have a little more dignity than that
at least the cop wrote "happy birthday" on the ticket.
RIGHT?!?! I'M ACTUALLY UPSET I DON'T GET TO MAKE THE 2.3 MILE TREK TO SUCK HIS COCK, yes I google earthed it.
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Just blowing bubbles with my nipple rings in my shower.
You always make things weird.
You're lucky you got out when you did, about an hour later the girl in the Franzia box started wrestling everyone.
Although now I have "number of cheese slices" as a unit of boob measurement in my head.
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
Was Mr. ROBOT good? I missed it. I just fucked dental hygienist on the trampoline in my backyard
How do you feel about a threesome?
Will you be there?
I'm the one asking!
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