i remember getting really pissed off when you wouldn't let me sleep in the garage with your cat.
Guy in our group took down a chick in a wheelchair last night.
My dealer's mom died on christmas eve. Is it too soon to see if he's holding?
My friend just ordered a beer and poured it on the floor in celebration of open bar night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've ID'd the nipple biter.
You kept making that girl eat peanuts, saying they were good for her baby..... I don't think she pregnant
This text is addressed to sober me: getting drunk by yourself may have seemed like a Good idea at first bit it can tell you that it wasn't ad fun as you thought it would be
Ps your lap top bag is FULL of empty beets
I'm a terrible friend...i should have come right over instead of having sex for an hour and a half. :/ want anything from burger king?
I mean I sucked his dick at 3 AM... UNDERWATER. I think I have earned a follow back on twitter.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Had sex with one of the guys from Ireland. Celebrating st pattys early.
I just had a very enlightening conversation with my hat. we need more of whatever the fuck that was.
Its like drunk me is Oprah except instead of a car everyone's award is seeing my boobs
please tell dad to clear the porn off his tablet before he lends it to anyone from now on
Can I get my morals surgically removed?
dude. i woke up on a random lawn wearing only my boxers, with all my clothes hung in the branches of a nearby tree... no more shrooms
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