we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
So I don't have any furniture but we just skateboard drunk around the floor.
I'm watching tv and he's trying to stick a vibrator in my ass
I just sneezed and it tasted like taco bell.
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We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
you handed me the dorito you were about to eat and told me to 'keep him safe' while you went to the bathroom
Um...any recollection of peeing in the pantry
No just sleep deprived. James woke me up at 7 and forced me to eat a hot pocket with him cause he " didn't want me to die".
I just saw a herd of slutty loofahs run down the street...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I appreciate alcohol much more now that I have to be sober sometimes
I shit like a lady though so that rarely happens
I will be the DD but everyone has to call me Mistress
God help them if any millennials are in the vicinity. Rent is too high and we no longer fear death
Pretty penis doesn't make up for awkward eye contact.
I didn't think you wanted your identity stolen along with your dignity. My mistake.
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