The guy next to me is watching porn. EVERYTIME I COME TO THE LIBRARY SOME RANDOM GUY NEXT TO ME LOOKS AT PORN.
I wouldn't call it sex. It's like when you put a plug in a socket half way. It's not all the way in but it still turns on the light.
It was so romantic--he turned me around to face the sunset during doggy-style over the couch back.
new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She just did a myspace photoshoot with her baby
Tell me the dirtiest joke you know
Sarah Palin
god, I love you
She threw up a whole curly fry. A. WHOLE. CURLY. FRY.
Apparently as I was doing the walk of shame home my dad's date was on her way to hers. hoes come in all ages these days
you are not perverted enough for this relationship to work out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I walked in on you rubbing your nose all over his face while straddling him and yelling "I'M SO SORRY!" repeatedly. I'd say you were in pretty good shape at that point in the night.
All I need right now is some mouthwash, dignity, and security camera footage...
So many gingers... It's like a beacon went out that said "this one is ok with red hair"
My mom comes home from her weekend with her lesbian co-workers and asks "You wanna know how I got these bruises?" I've never been more torn about anything EVER.
I just want to smoke weed and be the little spoon all winter. My modern day hibernation.
He looks like Aladdin, and that's about all he's got going for him.
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