I am going to be in the room whjen you have your first child and spit on its face before its even all the way out of you.
Just did the walk of shame across state lines...milestone?
video games are the ultimate cock blocker
I just had a librarian tell me that "wikipedia is like sex"
When he expanded on the analogy it actually made sense. "you're going to do it either way, so I'm just going to tell you how to do it safely."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The lawn was on fire, but I fixed it.
I don't know, I don't really wanna ask the question, "Mom why am I not circumcised?"
Just woke up. Need to shower and fuck. Be there when I'm done disappointing. Should be 30.
there were staples in my comforter. what kind of sex did we even have?
I'm treating this like a real date. My boobs aren't even out.
I'm so proud, I have tears
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What was the point of renting a $600 trolley if no one even remembers going to the first bar?
She asked me to come on her OkCupid date with her
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
NO FUCKBOY SHALL PASS OPERATION #BITCHMODE HAS SUCCEEDED
IM FILLED WITH SANDWICHES AND SELF LOATHING
That's good. So do you know why there is a giant pile of old tires in the laundry room and kitchen?
Well we knew you needed some tires, found someone on the way home who was giving them away and took them all. Has to be 4 in there you can use.
Randomize