Oh shit, I think we need to get you a hobby that doesn't include penises
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
Corey Haim died. 80's me is so sad
apparently, i ordered a pogo stick last night. i can't even be mad about that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
2am update: i think I'm in Mexico but I found a dennys. Everyone but this cute family of 4 is speaking Spanish. Cute family of 4 is helping me out.
Pretty sure i didnt get thrown out cause why dont i have more bloody areas
I can now tell my grandchildren Central Park has really great spots for quickies...
asked the cab driver where he learned Swahili last night.
Sorry I pissed in your dining room and kicked your best friend in the face while he was passed out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude just pulled his dick out and started stroking it and making s sound like cocking a shotgun....wtf was in those e pills
In other news there is a guy at my office who I'm pretty sure will be wearing someone's skin as a coat one day.
I don't want to flatter myself but after the way he was looking at me today I think it might be me.
I have woke up on a strange couch, in a strange house, on another campus. Can you Friend-Find me and pick me up?
I was fed cake in bed and then was pinned down and ridden till I came. And then fed more cake. I'm going to marry Brad. I'll put money on it.
There are both cum and chocolate stains on my sheets. Can't decide whether this is a new low or a new high.
My glasses were in the garbage this morning
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