you're the one who masterbates every night to the titanic soundtrack
i'm at the st pattys day thing. the bar is packed. they just put on celine dion its all coming back to me now. i'm screaming the words.
it's 1 pm.
hes a good boy he deserves a good blow
Youre at medical school. Im eating raw cookie dough, pickles, and orange juice. Naked. On a monday afternoon. I clearly make better life choices than you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If I was there, I'd make you a vicodin spiked sandwich.
IDK who she called, but some guy came into the party, flying drop kicked Joe said never again. She has to invite him around again.
at least the person I hooked up with donates to charity, the shirt I was wearing this morning was his relay for life shirt.
My lecture teach is passed out next to me. I think I'm doing pretty good for a freshman.
Can you pick up from work today? There's a surprise for you on the bed and I haven't gone blind which is positive.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well I woke up naked, with a santa hat on, and a bag of beef jerky next to me. So yeah, I would say it was a pretty successful trolley
I just want to sit my fat ass down at McDonald's and never leave
You don't usually get feedback after a one night stand... But you hit it out of the park. I'm proud to call you a friend.
I have to make calls today at work. So I'm gonna call your phone and leave some random messages. Just delete them.
I'm going to need to invest in some knee pads if I keep having nights like tonight
She just kept screaming and saying "fucking you is like fucking a mountain"
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