And now his mom knows I was dipping my pen in company ink
I just ate 3 burrito supremes and a crunchwrap...can't feel feet...I think I have diabetes
I would like to remind you that Mike's hard lemonade only goes good with an extra light cigarette and seminal fluid.
I would pay so much money for a video of you fucking a sheep
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
bitch so ugly she owes me an erection
Friends don't let friends talk to people who live in Orlando. Sorry I've failed you.
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
She told me a motorboat isn't successful unless they come out gasping for air. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED!!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you want me to retract my crazy cat lady comments pictures of yourself dressed as a cat are not the way to do it.
Captain Morgan didnt let me down when i stand up it feels like the world is trying to hand me rainbows.
The EMT told me when I left the ER "I'd like to take off your pants again and inspect your package. Just not during a medical emergency..." We're hooking up tonight.
Points for getting a hot hook up after getting a shard of glass in your thigh. Almost makes it worth it.
brushed my teeth nine times since getting home, still afraid there are pubes hiding in between my molars. fucking gummy bears
I love you but this is the first Saturday I have ever spent at the police station. And where are my boxers?
How high?! We watched paid programming for 45 minutes before we realized it wasn't just a long commercial. So pretty high. The Bionic fish finder looks promising, though.
Lets get a boat first.
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