I can't watch pbs sober anymore
dude i woke up laying next to some guy. i dont have my bra or his name. he has a nice tv though.
Omg. There's def a kid, like 10 years old, sitting in a buggy at wal mart holding a sign that reads "I can't behave"
just saw a dude in a v-neck sweater on a bike drinking starbucks. way to feed the stereotypes white dude.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Fuck the gym. I just shaved m'cooch and my pants now fit looser.... Dont judge me.
she was handing out condoms w/ her number on them...
She gave me head while using a laptop on my stomach to go online. I've never seen a better feat of multitasking.
After blacking out and loosing my phone for a month, I found it in the parking lot across the street. Last text "rager in the street". I remember none of this.
he fell asleep like an hour after we got to the beach, he deserved that penis shaped sunburn.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just...no. You make my soul cry. You are giving me karma-cancer. This torture of my majesticness can no longer be tolerated.
I think the saddest part about my sex life is that most of it is pity sex.
Let's be honest I'm gonna watch murder she wrote and eat taquitos at three am
My Dicks been hard all day. Poor guy isn't used to vacation being over
For dinner, I'm having saltines, canned whipped cream, and beer. Are we sure I'm responsible enough for home ownership?
Sext me about skeletons
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