We were both sleeping and she woke up and just puked i feel so bad for everyone around us
rhymes with "ouble enetration"
the best part about being a teacher is there are always 20 little kids around me to blame my farts on
i either just walked in on pete wacking off to webmd or he was checking his dick for herpes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my history teacher totally just suggested that we record his lectures and play drinking games with them later so that we pay attention to the material.
when life gives you lemons, puke and rally.
That's the girl I met who was peeing on the driveway with me. We bonded
"guaranteed dick" "anywhere - her room, my room, trees, couch"
Sorry that was quotes about you from the grad student.
I'm pretty sure I'm the first person in the history of this college to rollerblade their walk of shame.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also, I pretty much need an IV of fluids straight to my soul
I just bought emergency deodorant at Dominick's and put it on in front of a homeless man while waiting for the bus. He laughed and said 'girl, you a mess'. This is my life.
I just fist bumped God in my head for last night. What a bro.
He threw up on my head while I was blowing him, and then I started barfing, and the kitchen floor was a mess. Believe me, he will never, ever live this down.
How do u ask ur friend if shes keeping her kid but in a chill way
I'm still very high. To be blunt. No pun intended.
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