I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
You realize if you die tommorow, the last memory i'll ever have of you is your ballsack on skype
Just burped. Tasted like beer and cherios...Beerios. This is gonna be quite a day.
I don't have the money to get a cast so we made one from stuff at the craft store.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
getting caught by my parents in bed with another guy was way easier coming out than telling them over dinner like I had planned.
we seriously had to hang a plastic bag on his ears so he could throw up right into it.
I just peed next to my dog in the yard. Unparalleled forms of bonding going on over here.
Being a slut is okay if you're being a polite slut, right?
Just saw a woman in a hospital gown with a Steelers jersey on top smoking a cigarette while hooked up to an IV outside of the hospital. I love Pittsburgh.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
mom in a round about way told me to either donate my eggs or become a surrogate bcuz I need money.
My bullwhip has saved my life tonight and gotten me laid. I'm gonna be Indiana Jones every Halloween!
He gave me a card that said "I'm so glad we found each other... In the pants" and a pat on the head... My walk of Shame wasn't so bad.
Giving the guy pizza was a good idea. Leaving him naked on the pool table makes you my hero
dude the dog literally grabbed the condom out of the trash can and threw it in the air i'm screaming
Dude this weed has me so paranoid.
Yeah tell me about it I just screamed after I coughed because my own cough scared me.
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