Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
8th day he invented the big mac, 9th he invented pop rocks, 10th day boobs.
I drank mimosas and played bocce ball in the middle of finals week...now i know how Comm majors feel all the time.
Just saw a woman walking a golden retriever and a vacuum down the road. I miss downtown.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well I woke up with spatula marks on my ass and burns on my hands.
Why did you leave me a note saying 'find the canary'
There are so many Jimmy John's employees here
Where are you?
Jimmy John's.
I was expecting a blowjob when she shoved me in the bathroom but instead she shaved my pubes into a mustache for my penis. I am still satisfied.
I. Put. Them. Back. We are NOT making a habit of jail visits.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I only saw you for about 5 min, but you were rambling about how not even the whiskey could make you fight the skeleton guards.
She told me she was eating frosting, then I got the weirdest boner ever
God loves me. So high, craving Jimmy Johns chips, looked down, unopened bag in front of me. Still doesn't feel real
Master Skywalker, there are too many of them. What am I going to do?
Hit on the one in the red shorts. The thirst is strong with this one.
I just drunkenly accidentally had sex with my boss
Did you at least ask for a raise?
No but I am now the owner of one of either his or his roomate's teeshirts... Maybe I can use it to negotiate?
I did not marry a roomba.
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