I mean I can't believe yesterday ended w/ your house getting firebombed. What an unexpected turn of events
At my boss' house at a bbq. Had a few beers. Taking a poop - there's no TP...this is my nightmare.
Just saw the liqour store owner get into a mercedes, almost proud to be responsible for that
I would give up sex for lent, but I think Jesus would understand that I went too long without it to go back now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she starting giving me head in the taxi..the driver told her to stop..she looked up, said "I'm the birthday girl", and kept on doing what she was doing.
My room should be renamed "Land of the Misfit Condoms."
Pretending to care to care about playoffs in exchange for free shots. I'm sorry in advance.
Changed it back. Somehow I didn't think my profile pic should be me shirtless on ecstasy, ya know?
One day her vagina is just going to shrivel up and seal itself with it's self preservation mechanism
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The plan is that you eat an edible first, then pressure your dad to do one. You know you are down.
I have to date her we need a place to stay for tailgating
Yeah but sometimes your vagina needs to be fed and when we are drunk we tend to eat junk food
just wanted to eat pizza off his dick so he let me and he can never forget it
Vacuum the place before you go out of town there are random glitter cocks everywhere
I dont know if hes kidding... but hes drunk and said hes going to shave his balls. Alert your emt friends
Randomize