Scratch that. Lia's boy toy's brother has a gorilla costume. This is gonna be great.
Let me guess--your parents are cousins.
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
Pretty sure I blacked out the last 48 hours, the last thing I remember is the 4 pm bar crawl on Thurs
Can you believe they're going to let me be a doctor?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Take my keys. Load me into the vehicle. Drive. Get food. Come back. These are my demands.
You're the only person that can successfully use titties and Jesus in the same sentence.
Exactly. This is the bit where I learn a heartwarming lesson about not making my drinks half vodka
mate, my mother watched me threw up out of my nose wearing only a g-string.
words I never want to hear dad say again: "Trevor you sexy man you"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Should I be concerned you put your last name in my phone as "danger"?
You guys wanna start around 10:30 tomorrow?
We can start at 5am for all I care. You ask like I have plans.
I was shitfaced. I filled my contact case WITH TANNING LOTION
Facebook is for cat videos and having better lives than people from high school, period.
Honestly after an incomprehensible political rant yoga seems like the best option at 2 am
He wants me to fart in his mouth and is offering me SOOOO much coke. I'm stuck between a rock and a hard place. GIVE ME ADVICE.
Randomize