There is now a Twilight themed dildo. What do YOU want for christmas??
I feel like sober is me a distant relative that I only see on christmas..
Mango Malibu should win a nobel peace prize
Theres a disney princess moonbounce on karen st. and I'm drinking beer at a little league field. this might end with me in jail.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Had to have a serious talk with my liver and remind it that it is my birthday weekend and there are three more nights like last night ahead of us
pre-gaming in the library. just gonna keep going until i'm too drunk to keep working and then i'll be there.
I think he just caught a duck in mid flight
We decided this year instead of not participating in Halloween at all we are going to hand out free beers to the parents.
He wanted to have sex in a church because he has keys to it from court-ordered community service. WHAT IS STANDARDS?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, did you know, your blood is contaminated with over 17 non-beer fluids?
These kids are nice. Shrooms make everything so nice.
Just got a handjob from a 19 year old in front of the Parthenon. The Greek god of debauchery would be proud.
It was one of those "how did I get to my bed and what am I wearing" mornings.
Apparently I drunkenly agreed to help the homeless. For once, I'm not disappointed in drunk me. Four for you, drunk self. You go, drunk self!
So the makeout sesh? Not so great. His stubble rubbed my face raw, he tried to push me towards auto-erotic asphyxiation, and he licked my forehead. Twice.
Randomize