I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
for a minute I thought I needed to put on pants to go get a burrito, but then I remembered I'm in college
You suck. You're fired. I need to find a less reasonable voice-of-reason.
He kept buying me shots of tequila. I decided to just save myself the half hour of toilet hugging and tell him straight up that I intended on sleeping with him. We got Tacos on the way home with all the money we saved.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well duh, alcohol and getting fucked up are the world's common languages.
I think he was trying to tie my clitoris in a knot with his tongue. So awful.
I wasn't half as drunk as u but u were saying u were a "worm" and u tried to slither out of my grasp
I feel like everyone in class can tell we had a threesome last weekend.
The security deposit's gone, let's trash this motherfucker
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The next time you fuck up, your grandma sees your dick pics
For a second I thought I had fallen asleep on the floor and freaked out. Then I thought somehow I was on drugs. This is my life.
I HATE HIM SO MUCH I HOPE HE GETS IN SOME WEIRD ACCIDENT WHICH MAKES IT IMPOSSIBLE FOR HIM TO NUT
I've faked every orgasm I've ever had, I think I can fake being sick for 8 hours.
annnnd thats why you don't tip your waiter by flashing them
I just realized this morning that my fridge is stocked with coronas, hot dogs, and cheese dip. And I just got waxed. High-five, your best friend is on track to be all kinds of slutty fun this wkd.
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