eric is really sick so I'm taking care of him! :(
just blow him with soup in your mouth.
By the way, your roommate is right. His penis is much bigger than yours.
I just had sex in a moon bounce. It is all down hill from here.
Apparently the library doesn't care about celebrating the day Jesus became a zombie.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Pre-order weed for 4/20 and i'll give you a discount.
It's been two days. My balls feel like watermelons.
I woke up this morning at 8 to my roommates still drunk, hanging out on the roof, and screaming at bikers. They couldn't figure out why they were into it.
I'm covered in mustard and it looks like I nose dived in to barbed wire ??? Was last night that good?
I just remember looking over and seeing you on top of him and us high fiving. That's when I knew we'd be perfect roommates
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't believe he just friend zoned me like that.
Dude, you're not even gay.
I'm at a restaurant. I am NOT about to discuss my asshole over the phone.
I'm about to order this penis-casting kit so text me within 5 mins if you're not down
Our lives are a motherfucking joke
Oh? And how would you explain this to your kids?
"Well pumpkin, when mommies and daddies have loved each other so much for a really long time, sometimes they trade off with other mommies and daddies"
Most people that see those numbers aren't going to realize what they mean and those that do will think 'oh those must be her favorite hockey players' and not 'oh she wants to see those hockey players fuck each other'.
Randomize