I found out 2day that my dad was a stripper in New Oleans.
This random guy just introduced himself then said "So, I am staying at my friends place and he has a 4 year old, so we should probably go back to your house." WTF kind of vibes do I give off?
my boobs just fell out on the dance floor. my wedding is totally beating your wedding
I just found out why they dont make table-dance tables out of glass.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i don't know how the hand towel got involved, but i peed all over it
I might have a beer. Just to keep this hangover on its toes.
I need you to stand in the corner and ref this threesome. Wear stripes.
So what's the verdict on pumpkin smoothies with vodka? I puked.
Does saving a line for myself for the morning so I don't seem hungover at work count as responsibility?
Adult decisions.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Best part of Friday afternoon drinking? Having ping pong balls thrown into my cleavage.
its like a catch 22, sucks that you've stopped, but its like a vagina high five
It's finals week and I'm halfway done with this bag of wine and don't plan on stopping. Say goodbye to my GPA
It has now been 10 days since we last saw Sebastians penis
Want to come over and dangle your tits on top of me like a skewer?
I'm just letting you know right now in advance that if I die or go to the hospital or end up in jail tonight it's because your kid sold me mushrooms.
Randomize