do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
just took a pee in my own yard...decided i had to poo..only got a dingle berry....wiped it away with my finger..help me...my mom AND dad are home.
not only did i manage to get kicked out of the bar, i also got kicked out of denny's. i didnt even know that was possible.
No it was after you showed us his fraternaty letters shaven out of your pubes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hundreds of bug bites..Dad jokingly says "looks like you passed out naked in the woods somewhere"
More or less binge drinking as a giant grape seemed justified
Do you think the neighbors will know I was the one giving out the penis shaped lollipops to the children?
Dude. All those hangovers I never had came back with a vengeance. I just opened the door of this car to barf. The car was not motionless. We are on the autobahn.
Come over we're celebrating the one month anniversary of her first 4/20
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well, thats the first guy to go to jail because of my vagina
Post that event on your timeline
But I swear to god if I'm awkwardly there while you try to have sex with someone again I'm getting high with your dad
You kept sacrificing me last night. You would just yell out "Virgin Sacrifice!!" and then throw me into a circle of men.
I am sorry. I am also on acid.
He says the sweetest things but also that he wants to choke me when we fuck so it's kinda perfect.
This guy wants me to put ice under his foreskin. What!?
Randomize