Drinking mikes hard & watching the swan princess. i fucking LOVE college
i just watched a special on porn, the business isn't doing so good. You may want to wait before you start your career
Am i fat?
Well i wouldnt let you on top
we weren't quite sure what was on that mirror, so we snorted it and hoped for the best
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently, his doctor was impressed with how well we took care of his leg. We're like the kings of naked triage.
Sorry for locking you out after accusing you of eating my Skittles... I realized I was mistaken after just throwing up the rainbow.
She just locked herself in the bedroom with an unopened bottle of wine and a steak knife. Unfortunately for her fingers, I stopped giving a fuck two hours ago.
He tied me to the bed, fucked me and left me tied up until he proved to his room mates that he actually fucked me. But other than that, best sex ever!
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm glad you have such faith in my ability to find the worst situations with my vagina.
I'm 2 beers deep on an empty stomach, and I just wanna say, I pride myself on my use of commas
I was "singing along to the Lego Movie" high. Everything was not awesome
We had sex six times. In a span of 8 hours. Confirmation I don't need to go to the gym.
You sat on me. Like I was a toilet. While I was on the toilet. You peed a little.
He did a backflip because drugs
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