tfor prom could you pick me up wo bottles of champagne and a condom, please?
if being creepy is wrong, then i don't want to be right
I just caught Brandon licking the fake chocolate on a smores ornament
It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just made a "things you cannot forget to do this week just because you're high" list.
Charging the asians next door to us $5 a page to print their final papers because theirs broke. Bars close in 2 hours, lets go
Everytime I sleep with him he gives me another hint to what his tattoo means. I'm like a slutty Nancy Drew.
Come over so we can hookup and eat tacos. Those are 2 things you can't possibly turn down.
I think I'm allergic to vodka. Or people getting engaged. One or the other. I want to die.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I fell asleep in the tanning bed, naked, for an hour and a half and I guess they couldn't wake me up so they called the fire department...and they came in while I was passed out naked...
I'm gonna eat more dunkaroos to cope with what's in my vagina.
I just wanna have sex and go to Denny's after is that too much to ask for.
I was sitting here smiling wondering why i'm so fucking happy at work. cookie has kicked in
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
I sent him home with blood on his fingers and shame in his heart.
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