i was just at lovers lane looking for gifts for a bachelorette party.....with my mom
you guys were way drunker than both of me
i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
My life would be so much easier if i could just ride around in the cash cab all day
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Close your eyes and stop texting and think about puppies. You'll be fine.
i'm taking a spore imprint of the mushroom we found growing in our bathroom and sending a picture to ryan. he will then be able to tell if it's trip-worthy
I wish I could like. Pull my liver out, and put it in the corner of a boxing ring, put a towel and ice on it, rub it's shoulders, and tell it to "get back in there, you got this!".
why is my forehead so bruised?
i found you outside knocking on the door with your head because you couldn't lift your arms.
I thought it went well, but he just sent me a video of me sucking an icicle on the fire escape of his building with the caption "The ice got more than I did." Somehow I feel like I owe him a blowjob.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Bring enough bail money and little extra for tacos after
threw up outside of the dorms in the parking lot in the pouring rain on the first day of class, i'd say summer is off to a good start.
Nothing says casual like stairwell bjs
i think the realest test of our friendship is how hot your sister looks right now
He's got that kind of dick that just MAKES me cheat on my boyfriend. It deserves a trophy. Really you should give it ride sometime.
Yo I'm lookin at the cows. They're just fucking docile things
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