I never thought that I'd hear someone utter the words, "I need another studded belt." I was wrong.
when your english prof writes "this was a real good paper" on your essay, you know you're at the wrong college
This whole foot fetish thing is getting out of control. He would rather hold my feet than me after we fuck.
omg he fucking fingered me this morning. and i was just like this is the most awkward alarm clock ive ever had
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
As we were fooling around he told me he was conceived on this bed like it would turn me on.
Well the walls are thin and I can hear the couple next door having sex. I think their dog is somehow involved.
Haha...we lost by one cup to a guy w shitty facial hair. What makes me most mad abt the loss is that I could grow a better beard on my vag.
Topenga is going to be back on TV. Finally my fantasy of her being a milf in junior high has come full circle.
You can't call dibs on the bed... every time you party you KO in the bathtub
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sigh. I haven't seen a dick since August 22nd. And in case you forgot, it's January.
I can guarantee he will smoke me out and I won't feel bad about it because he gets to touch my butt.
Every morning should start with 2 orgasms and a shoulder massage
Heading there now. Already have a boner.
you walked into the party, and all you had on was your left sock... literally.
Don't drink and try to take a shower. I thought I was drowning
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