tell your sister to shave her snatch
Whatever it was. it was pregnant.
i feel like someone uncorked me like a wine bottle and pulled a living animal outta my arse.
Just saw a cop issuing a DUI. At 3 pm. It's definitely the start of winter break.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well since you're still married, you will be paying for my abortion right?
she's laying in my bed with an ice pack on her vagina. how do you think it went?
And by that I mean I told her the plot of the first batman movie as my life and it took her like 20 minutes to figure it out
Hey, 'thunder cock' as proud as I am for you getting laid, could you put a muzzle on her? I have to be up at 5, thanks.
81 degrees in april.... Thinking margaritacicles, you in?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
doing squats while I brush my teeth.. gotta keep the booty in check
You could see the bone sticking out of his shin and he insisted he was "just gunna walk it off"
Hydrocodon makes you feel like a fairy made out of pudding
I just showered and shaved both ankles and one knee because that's the skin that's exposed in the jeans I'm wearing today. Please tell me I'm not the only one who does that.
u better not lose ur virginity to a sugar daddy who doesn’t post a pic of himself to tinder
If work found out I was using THEIR paper to write Karate Kid fanfic I'd never hear the end of it.
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